Robot chat masturbation

17-Dec-2016 00:41 by 4 Comments

Robot chat masturbation

Check out this robot arm capable of handwriting which is orders of magnitude clearer than our own.

Because in Silicon Valley, I'm reliably informed, the Wave Of The Future is exactly this: summoned, intelligent servants which you can control if you know their True Name.(There's a Terminator misquote here that I'm desperately trying not to make.) Meanwhile, there are dozens of other people who are attempting to chat up a slightly different state machine.Advertisers on porn sites around the world have figured out that users are, shall we say, somewhat preoccupied, and there are a limited number of advertising techniques that will work. Summoned servitors are about to make the mother of all comebacks.We have natural language processing sophisticated enough to comprehend most messages. And this is where we go back to the "fucking a CPU" thing.We have messaging systems that everyone uses, with APIs that allow bots to access them. By now you're probably thinking "And we've got learning bots too! We've already seen Microsoft unveil Tay, their twitter bot.One of the most common ones is a "fake chat" ad—an attractive woman propositioning the user with the promise of, at least, some hot Facebook or Snapchat messages. Because tech developments in other areas are about to turn the whole "sex with your PC" deal from "crude and somewhat rubbish" to "looks like the AIs just took a really unexpected job away". I'm rather enthusiastic about that on a fictional level.

Some of the more advanced ads actually take the user to a landing page where a very, very crude script will respond to them. Indeed, the film I just released, DANGEROUS TREASURES, came very close to being called BOUND THINGS instead—it's a story of a couple of geeks who follow clues on a deepweb occult forum which lead them to have a lengthy and bloody interaction with the bound guardian of the treasure they're robbing.The demonstration shows off it’s abilities by drawing a Hilbert Curve.From watching the action you’ll realize that, though this arm and hand look fantastic, this is really a SCARA plotter.A lot of people have written about its rapid transformation into a shitposting racist as an amusing side feature, or a huge and terrifying weakness. Microsoft Tay, and it's /pol/ification, is where the Chatbot Revolution really begins.So let's go back to our porn surfer chatting up a state machine, and our self-bondage enthusiast tied to a Bluetooth vibrator.For the bondage enthusiasts, it's orgasm and sexual arousal - both of which can be measured if said user doesn't mind strapping some electronics to their genitals.

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